I have a confession to make. I used to enjoy some of TLC's reality shows. Not the "let's turn people into freak show" ones about people who weighed 1,000+ pounds or — gag — the pimple-popper one, but the more family-oriented ones. It started with "Jon & Kate Plus 8," though that turned out to be a mess, and "Little People, Big World." I also loved "Outdaughtered," the show about the couple who chose life in the face of adversity and welcomed beautiful quintuplets, and "7 Little Johnstons," which is a show about a family that is somewhat local to me that grew through adoption.
For the most part, these shows were somewhat wholesome, and they were something my mom and I could watch together in her later years when she was sick and not able to do much of anything else. I think I also watched with a little bit of envy because I'd always wanted a big family myself.
But TLC's latest "family-oriented" reality show doesn't sit well with me.
It's called "The Baldwins," and it follows America-hating, homophobic actor Alec Baldwin; his "Spanish" wife, "Hilaria;" and their 1,383 kids through everything from his trial for shooting cinematographer Halyna Hutchins and how difficult it was for their family to what looks like some "day-in-the-life"-type stuff in which Alec tells the kids not to pee in the pool and "Hilaria" yells at them for eating chocolate.
Over the years, both members of the Baldwin couple have proven themselves to be questionable human beings, so now, this TV network decides to reward them with their own show? I was going to say "no thanks," but "hell no" seems like a better response.
Related: Washed-Up Actors Go to Italy, Claim Americans Are Uneducated and Uninformed
Where to start? I guess I'll start from the beginning for those who don't know. In 2011, Baldwin began dating a "Spanish" yoga instructor named "Hilaria." In less than a year, they were married, and the year after that, they had their first child. Between 2013 and 2022, they had seven kids, sometimes incorporating surrogates because I guess they couldn't procreate fast enough on their own. Two of those kids are about five months apart.
"Hilaria" kind of gave off grifter vibes from the start. About a minute after she married Alec, she became a correspondent for the entertainment show "Extra" and continued to push her own celebrity faster than she birthed children.
Well, as it turns out, "Hilaria" was not a Spanish woman at all, and "Hilaria" wasn't even really her name. This European immigrant was actually a privileged white lady from Massachusetts named Hillary Hayward-Thomas who vacationed in some ritzy part of Spain a few times and decided she was Spanish. She faked her whole life story and even her accent, which she maintains on and off to this day. Here's a video of her fake Spanglish on full display from about a month ago:
It is so WILD that Alec Baldwin's wife Hilaria Baldwin is still pretending be Latina 😂😂😂 She's from Boston, but pretends to keep forgetting English words like "cebolla? how you say? i forgot it... onions" 😂 pic.twitter.com/0dPPn3IeNH
— ¡El SooperMexican! ن c137 🦬 (@SooperMexican) December 30, 2024
But even dumber than the grifter who lies about her entire identity is the man who falls for it, I suppose. Then again, anyone with a television or device to access the internet knows that Alec Baldwin isn't very bright. In fact, he's a jerk. You can tell that by Googling his name because you're met with headlines like "Alec Baldwin’s Biggest Scandals, Most Controversial Moments Through the Years." You don't get those kinds of headlines for being a good guy. Let's take a look at some of them.
His ex-wife Kim Basinger called him a "challenge," years ago when he called their 11-year-old daughter a "pig" among other things on a voicemail that went public. He's been arrested for punching photographers. He's used homophobic slurs to insult people, which eventually led to the canceling of his MSNBC show. (When you don't even meet MSNBC standards, you know you screwed up.) He was once kicked off a flight for refusing to turn off his phone because he was playing Words With Friends.
He was also arrested for disorderly conduct in 2014 for riding his bike the wrong way down a New York City sidewalk and refusing to cooperate with police. In 2018, he allegedly punched a man over a parking spot outside of his apartment. And, of course, in 2021, he killed a woman on a movie set after accidentally firing a prop gun. While he was initially charged with involuntary manslaughter, a judge dismissed those charges.
In November, he went to Italy and basically called all Americans idiots who don't truly understand the world. "Americans are very uninformed about reality, what's really going on — with climate change, Ukraine, Israel, you name it. All the biggest topics in the world, Americans have an appetite for a little bit of information," he said.
And, of course, he made "Hilaria" quasi-famous or famous enough that I am forced to know she exists.
So now these two people have decided to further force themselves upon us, exploit their poor children who are already going to have a rough enough time growing up with these two as parents, and bring us a reality show. The person at TLC who okayed this idea should be fired immediately. But no one listens to me.
Instead, the powers that be at TLC released a preview of "The Baldwins" on Monday, and if social media is any indication, very few people are happy with the idea. The trailer shows various clips of the couple doing glam Hollywood things combined with clips of them at home struggling to take care of their brood — I didn't see their two 24/7 nannies anywhere, though I'm sure they were in the vicinity, just off camera — followed by some clips of Alec crying and "Hilaria" looking upset as they talk about how hard the infamous "Rust" set shooting and trial were on him and their family.
Family, chaos, love… repeat! Say hello to the #TheBaldwins - a new reality series that offers an intimate, behind-the-scenes look into the lives of Alec and Hilaria Baldwin and their seven children. 🏡💖 Premiering on Sunday, February 23 at 10/9c! pic.twitter.com/SaWlUm7Uwa
— TLC Network (@TLC) January 27, 2025
It all just seems kind of gross for any number of reasons. I refuse to watch it, and I seriously hope others follow. A friend of Halyna Hutchins — the woman Baldwin shot — made a documentary about her life as a wife, mother, and cinematographer. That sounds a lot more deserving of this airtime.
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